Friday, August 10, 2007


There seems to be a quietness--a lull in our adoption process that is a little unsettling for me. Most of it has to do with money since our biggest objective right now is to save enough money to proceed with the next set of services we need. But there is also the paperwork we're working on. Even though adoption is one of our highest priorities we are both finding it difficult to complete the required paperwork without feeling overwhelmed. My strategy is to plug away at it one tiny piece at a time until I get it done but Michael's seems to be to procrastinate all together. I guess one thing we really need (who doesn't, right?) is more time. In particular more time together. Maybe we'll have to schedule a day off together so we can work on this stuff, who knows? I guess I'm just struggling with the balance of it all. Life is busy and crazy even when there aren't big things like this in the works.

Right at the moment I feel as though I'm standing at the base of a large mountain with no sure idea of when or how I'm going to make it to the top. I guess all of these feelings are normal with such big life changes...?

To top it off I drank WAY too much coffee WAY too late last night and I cannot sleep for the life of me! Even though I know the rest of today is going to be exhausting and at some point in the next 24 hours I'm simply going to crash I cannot get myself to stop processing. Irritating!



Jen said...

omg, I feel TERRIBLE about the coffee, you must know that i feel personally responsible for that... and i am truly sorry, once the cycle has begun, it doesn't stop easily... and it goes like this: "stay up a little late, having a little coffee, and loose track of time and drink more and more coffee, until you can't sleep and you seriously question wether or not it would just be better to drink coffee all night and never sleep!

Robert & Nan said...

You WILL make it, Melba. Don't let the lull get you down!!

Love you

Holly said...

I know it has been a while since you posted this, but I just wanted you to know that I think about your journey to parenthood every day and I know you will get through this. I know in my heart of hearts that you and Michael are both meant to be parents. I love you. Keep your chin up.