When Love Rushes in

All of you who have preceded me to motherhood told me it would happen, but I only sort of believed it in theory. I truly did not expect to fall so instantaneously in love with one little person. I didn't expect (though I "knew") that all of the pain and longing I have felt all these years would simply melt away the moment his eyes met mine.

We just recently got Charlie to quiet down again after our first real experience with him crying-crying. It really upset me to see him so out of sorts. I know pretty much all the baby soothing tricks in the book, but I completely forgot every single one of them as I was trying to calm him. Thankfully, his crying spell didn't last long, and we were able to problem solve and help him relax, but man...that was intense! He is sleeping soundly in Daddy's arms once again as I type this.

So much has happened in so short a time, ideas and thoughts, and memories are swimming around in my mind. I have so much to do, and there are so many tiny stories I want to tell all of you. I am overwhelmed beyond measure. The outpouring of love and support I have received in response to our news about Charlie has humbled me.

As I was holding my baby boy just now, right after he had fallen back asleep, I wrote him a poem--or maybe these are a few different poems, I'm not really sure. I feel a little self conscious about posting these here - I really don't think of myself as poetic in the slightest. Still, I need to remember all of this, and I do want to share my thoughts.

When Love Rushes in

As my tears whetted
your tiny baby cheeks
I sang you a lullaby

In a moment so divine
your eyes found mine

it was then that I knew...
moments like these are special and few

Your brown skin next to my cream
I'm afraid I'm going to wake from this dream

There is nothing I can say to make you know
But oh...my little boy, I do love you so!