Half a year. When you say it like that, the time seems so much longer, and so much more momentous, which is exactly how it feels to me. I honestly cannot believe Charlie is six months old today. He is the greatest blessing I could ever have asked for, and I am awed by his existence. Six months ago today, our lives were on the cusp of great change, though we didn't know it at the time. On that fateful late April day, a tiny star was born. I am immensely grateful for the life of our son, and for the tremendous sacrifices made by his first mother so that he could be.
My sincere thanks go to Tracey for the adorable sweater Charlie is wearing here! Charlie is an amazing little boy. He delights me every single day with his sweet personality, and with all the new things he learns. He is joyful, and his happiness is catching. He has recently started babbling in his sleep, and even laughing sometimes too. It is the most darling thing I've ever seen or heard. When I look at him, it is crystal clear to me:
we needed this little boy! People tell us all the time that he's so lucky to have us, but I know we're the ones who are lucky! There is nothing sweeter to me than when I look into his soulful, brown eyes and see so much love reflected there. The way he watches me, and the way he smiles when we find each other, it is purely golden. Though I feel buoyed by his love for me, his need of me, I also feel that I'm not worthy of such adoration from this little person. I guess all mothers feel that to an extent?
There are a lot of changes forthcoming with the physical age of six months. He gets new pacifier nipples, new bottle nipples, and he can begin eating a much greater variety of solid foods now, all of which is very exciting.
I spent a good portion of this past weekend making baby food for him, and I had
so much fun! I made butternut squash, carrots, green beans, and apples, which I hope he will like. I'm excited for this new phase of babyhood and all the new experiences!
He started with green beans today...
...so far he's not too thrilled about them!
I'm not sure why exactly, but I've gotten a lot of satisfaction out of making Charlie's food. I think it must be similar (though very different, of course!) to that feeling a mother gets when she's breast feeding her baby. The knowledge that I'm giving my baby the best there is, and saving money at the same time is empowering!
In other developments, Charlie has recently become very good with his hands, which is pretty amazing to watch. He grabs at almost everything he sees now (including our glasses at the dinner table, and the glasses off my face!) and he will practice moving objects from one hand to the other. I love watching him do this over and over as he experiments with different items.
Today we went out in the back yard and played in the leaves. Of course, he kept wanting to put the them in his mouth, but he quickly figured out they're not the best tasting things in the world.
I guess Mommy knows a thing or two when she says the leaves taste yucky! 
He's also sitting up on his own now, though he will still topple occasionally if he's not 100 % balanced. We are still waiting on the teeth, but I keep thinking they will make a grand entrance any day now! He seems to really enjoy touching things. Often when I'm holding him he will rub my face with his hands, and grab my mouth while I'm talking. It is both funny and sweet when he does this.
He won't go to the doctor until next week, but he currently weighs almost exactly 16 pounds, and I would guess he's about 26 inches long. He's loving bath time these days, which I think is due at least in part to the fact that he can sit up in his tub now. His nails certainly do grow quickly though! Do any of the rest of you have trouble keeping up with your little one's nails? This is something that's been a lot harder for me than I ever expected. I have to cut them almost every three or four days, and with all the face touching and grabbing lately it's problematic if I forget.
Though they have been a complete whirlwind, these past six months have been some of the best of my entire life. I mentioned in
this post that I had a good feeling about my 33rd year, and it turns out my predictions were correct, our baby was already on the way a few days after I wrote that post. My truest self is the part of me that is "mother." I am loving being able to finally walk in those shoes. I am so glad, and so relieved that I no longer have to daydream about being a mother, and that I can now finally get down to the business of being one!
I hope and pray that those of you who are still waiting have your heart's desire fulfilled soon too.
This season is full of festive firsts at our house! December 13 is always a big day for us since it's 12 days before Christmas, and the day we have always decorated our house, including getting our tree and putting up lights. This has been our special family tradition since Michael moved over here from Scotland 13 years ago, a few weeks before we got married. This year the day was even more special though because we included a trip to see Santa at a local general store. This was a different experience from the mall Santa in that it was much more relaxed and simple. We also took our own pictures, as opposed to paying lots of money for them to do it, which was important to me. Charlie was fairly neutral about the whole thing, not overly thrilled and not overwhelmed either.
As for me though, I was giddy just like a little girl. I can hardly believe this is all really happening! When I sat him down on Santa's lap for the first time...a little thrill went through me at the realization that this is our son. I used to dream about becoming a mom, and part of my vision was always the excitement and joy I would feel surrounding the holidays. All I can really say is that reality has been even better than my dreams. Sure it's different because there are obligations and finances with which I am concerned now that were never a part of what I imagined, but the magic is still here and it is very real. I know Charlie is too young to really get it this year, but he is still full of wonder at all the new experiences he's having. I love being the person who is providing those for him...I love being Mommy, soaking up the joy of my son's first Christmas!
